A friend of mine has a wedding in less than two months. And while she’s not the bride, she has a special place in the wedding as the mother of the groom.
The other day I texted her:
“HAVE YOU GOTTEN YOUR DRESS YET??!!”
She had…kinda…There was a dress ordered, one she liked. One she was fine with.
But she didn’t love it.
“I haven’t wanted to think about it and keep telling myself no one will be looking at me anyway” she had said.
As a busy mom, I understood that sentiment.
But I couldn’t help but be a little concerned. Maybe she didn’t realize how important it was to LOVE her dress? Several years ago, I hadn’t realized that either.
“HAVE YOU GOTTEN YOUR DRESS YET??!!” my friend Nancy pressed, as my own daughter’s wedding loomed just weeks away. I, too, had a dress I could wear…one that was okay…but not one that I loved.
But Nancy wasn’t having it.
“YOU NEED TO GET A DRESS!!” she demanded. Lovingly, but she meant it. (Everyone needs a friend like Nancy!)
And she whisked me up to Annapolis and we spent hours searching and in changing rooms trying on possibilities…until, we found “the dress”. One that I loved and felt lovely in. And somehow, it helped me feel ready to love and celebrate the wedding day.
Had I worn something drab or unflattering, or something I just wasn’t crazy about, I might have struggled with self loathing and insecurity, and anxious thinking focused on my appearance.
Focused on me.
I didn’t want to be focused on me.
There’s a freedom in putting on something beautiful. A free-ing self-forgetfulness.
I didn’t have to think, I didn’t have to worry, I didn’t have to fear. I didn’t have to concern myself with me…I could just BE. And be free to really focus on others.
Which reminds me…when Jesus wraps me up in His righteousness, I’m made lovely, and I feel loved. He makes me beautiful. In Him, I’m free to just be. There’s no need for self-loathing, insecurity, worry or fear. I am His. I am loved. I am made lovely.
I can operate out of love, secure in knowing I am loved by Him. I can love the unlovely and unloved and unlovable because He has lavished so much of His own loveliness on me.
When I wear clothing of my own design, I may think it’s okay. And I may think “it will do”. But it never does. My own self righteous garments are ill fitting and highly unflattering. And frankly, they make me feel ugly. And make me think too much about myself.
Just as it’s important to find “the dress” it’s even more important to be dressed in what Christ has done and never in what I do. He dresses me in the most beautiful clothing, His very own, purchased at a great cost and given to me in love. When I “put on Christ”, I am no longer self focused, self-loathing, or self-centered. I am free from trying to manufacture my own artificial self-love too, because I am so perfectly, fully, and completely loved by Him.
When I’m wearing clothing of His design, I’m always beautifully dressed. 😊
